Don't wanna talk about him anymore. Just wanna shut up. Don't ask me why.
Aqidah Ahli Sunnah Wal Jama'ah
5 days ago
Showing posts with label arine's easter break. Show all posts
Showing posts with label arine's easter break. Show all posts
Saturday, 29 March 2008
Monday, 24 March 2008
Sunday, 23 March 2008
:)
:( Right now, everyone's gone. I'm the only daughter in the house. But no one's fighting with me for the laptop tonight.
I finished One Tree Hill Season 1 today, and my Econs homework (which is really confusing)
Can u imagine, yesterday my mum met her TKC friends at some kenduri, and became so... TKC girl. Ouch! And she went off with her friends. When Kakqilah called that night, my mum sounded so different, Kakqilah made this dramatic what-happened-to-mama exclamation mark that made us all laugh. Haha..now I can imagine her once being a TKC girl. That night, we picked Mama up and ate with Tokwan and a few relatives I don't really know. (Tokwan hhas a wide range of connection) And Tokwan insisted that we accompany him just for a while(that was until 12 actually). But then, he sounded very happy especially when a stream of little cousins showed up too. Yeah, I like seeing Tokwan happy. :)
Realizing that I am much heavier than Abang, I decided to cut down everything I eat by half. And yeah, my apetite kind of decelerate. :) But then Abang convinced me that I'm not fat, so well, I still half the food consumed but my apetite accelerate again. ^_^ Like Tokwan said, "Eat while you can still enjoy doing it" Heheh...
Bapak came back today. This time I got a tshirt from Stanford University-RED. Haha..I like it. I should make a collection of university tshirts, cause, that's basically the souvenir Bapak buys anywhere he goes. This time, Luqman got the special present-a pair of Timberland shoes. And he bought this whole of tshirts from Hollywood, but I ended taking another San Fransisco Tshirt.
Mr Bear? Well, it's complicated. But what I know, it's nice having him again in my life. :) I guess I wouldn't think too much of possibilities, and enjoy the moments with him. What I know, whatever it is, I wouldn't wanna lose him again. Yeah, he really let me see the world from a different angle. And it's good for me. But then I won't hope too much. I mean, life is still long ahead, so why think too much of that? It's good to settle down as friends. Then, there's no breaking ups, and friendship is something that stays. I mean true love is never temporary, so if it's true love, it'll last, right? And well, I guess, haha..Mcs just won't work with me anymore. ^_^ Yeah, Mc Sub is a good distraction:) but then I realized, I just don't wanna think of the things I should be thinking actually. It was fun, can't deny that, he's one interesting character to observe that reminds me a lot of the past, but then I should probably learn to let go the past. :)I don't know if I'm gonna succeed, but I'll try. Hahah..sometimes I think it's funny of me to actually thought of the "substitute" thing. But I guess, my "brilliant" theory of distraction turned out to be invalid, for me. Maybe it would work for Qyn? :P Hahah
I better return to Bismarck and the German Confederation. BYE
I finished One Tree Hill Season 1 today, and my Econs homework (which is really confusing)
Can u imagine, yesterday my mum met her TKC friends at some kenduri, and became so... TKC girl. Ouch! And she went off with her friends. When Kakqilah called that night, my mum sounded so different, Kakqilah made this dramatic what-happened-to-mama exclamation mark that made us all laugh. Haha..now I can imagine her once being a TKC girl. That night, we picked Mama up and ate with Tokwan and a few relatives I don't really know. (Tokwan hhas a wide range of connection) And Tokwan insisted that we accompany him just for a while(that was until 12 actually). But then, he sounded very happy especially when a stream of little cousins showed up too. Yeah, I like seeing Tokwan happy. :)
Realizing that I am much heavier than Abang, I decided to cut down everything I eat by half. And yeah, my apetite kind of decelerate. :) But then Abang convinced me that I'm not fat, so well, I still half the food consumed but my apetite accelerate again. ^_^ Like Tokwan said, "Eat while you can still enjoy doing it" Heheh...
Bapak came back today. This time I got a tshirt from Stanford University-RED. Haha..I like it. I should make a collection of university tshirts, cause, that's basically the souvenir Bapak buys anywhere he goes. This time, Luqman got the special present-a pair of Timberland shoes. And he bought this whole of tshirts from Hollywood, but I ended taking another San Fransisco Tshirt.
Mr Bear? Well, it's complicated. But what I know, it's nice having him again in my life. :) I guess I wouldn't think too much of possibilities, and enjoy the moments with him. What I know, whatever it is, I wouldn't wanna lose him again. Yeah, he really let me see the world from a different angle. And it's good for me. But then I won't hope too much. I mean, life is still long ahead, so why think too much of that? It's good to settle down as friends. Then, there's no breaking ups, and friendship is something that stays. I mean true love is never temporary, so if it's true love, it'll last, right? And well, I guess, haha..Mcs just won't work with me anymore. ^_^ Yeah, Mc Sub is a good distraction:) but then I realized, I just don't wanna think of the things I should be thinking actually. It was fun, can't deny that, he's one interesting character to observe that reminds me a lot of the past, but then I should probably learn to let go the past. :)I don't know if I'm gonna succeed, but I'll try. Hahah..sometimes I think it's funny of me to actually thought of the "substitute" thing. But I guess, my "brilliant" theory of distraction turned out to be invalid, for me. Maybe it would work for Qyn? :P Hahah
I better return to Bismarck and the German Confederation. BYE
Thursday, 20 March 2008
When the world turns around 360 degrees :)
Ever met a person who just makes you feel that everything is going to be okay again? I know everyone does, and I know everyone knows the value of it. :) And when you found that person, you'd do anything to make that person stay and always be there in your life.
Why do I fear the presence of that person in my life? Am I just afraid of needing someone else a little too much more than myself? Or probably the fact that someone actually makes me feel so safe? What am I thinking anyway? :)
Today is sure one tiring day. But fun, seeing Tokwan happy. He said so today after we dropped him at his house just a few minutes ago. We accompanied him to his best friend's daughter's house. At first, I felt so lazy, I tried to fake a sickness. But then, at last, I went with them. Although I have to admit I was bored to death, but at the end, I find that it was all worth it.
3 days to go before my dad's return to Malaysia. Poor Bapak, missing the Dr. Arif's ceremony. :) Hahah..Now we have 3 Drs at home. ^_^
Till then
Always,
ARINE
p.s: sorry Belle and Qyn, couldn't go out with u guys. My mum will never let me go that far alone..cause I'm a girl. Ouch! :P
Why do I fear the presence of that person in my life? Am I just afraid of needing someone else a little too much more than myself? Or probably the fact that someone actually makes me feel so safe? What am I thinking anyway? :)
Today is sure one tiring day. But fun, seeing Tokwan happy. He said so today after we dropped him at his house just a few minutes ago. We accompanied him to his best friend's daughter's house. At first, I felt so lazy, I tried to fake a sickness. But then, at last, I went with them. Although I have to admit I was bored to death, but at the end, I find that it was all worth it.
3 days to go before my dad's return to Malaysia. Poor Bapak, missing the Dr. Arif's ceremony. :) Hahah..Now we have 3 Drs at home. ^_^
Till then
Always,
ARINE
p.s: sorry Belle and Qyn, couldn't go out with u guys. My mum will never let me go that far alone..cause I'm a girl. Ouch! :P
Tuesday, 18 March 2008
I Just Need To Type Out Words..
Right now, it's late, and I'm alone in a room that is in a devastated state just like I am :) Hahah. Bapak just went outstation..again. But he's got work as far as USA and well, I think the alarm will ring again tonight. Unless, the regular burglar who used to steal the shoes we purposely put outside for disposal is not patient enough to wait for my lights to go off tonight, or for Luqman to stop watching football. Kakqilah's sick but the doctor tells her to eat ice cream and cold drinks. Mama is as always, tired when coming home, and Abang, being rather pious lately, is anxious for his results. Kakak, too, overworked and her friend who is our temporary occupant probably is sound asleep by now.
I just watched Cheaper By Dozen 2 and well, the last words caught me in the eye, "The hardest thing for a parent to do is letting go." I wonder too. How does it feel for my parents when all of us are growing up and day by day, share less and less things with her. And when we're all away to pursue in our lives, how would she feel coming back to an empty house?
You see, I think I've got two great parents that loves their children and provide us all not just a house, but a home. I'd be scolded if I miss dinner sometimes, cause well, that's basically our quality time together. But sometimes I wonder, what will happen to our family in the future then. I bet Kakak will be marrying soon, she's 24, Abang's gonna be some doctor far from us all, Kakqilah would be going to UK this year, probably I would, next year (if I focus :)) and well, Luqman, I know he'll go far, with such a creative mind and his social skills :)
Bapak once said, "Your family is everything to you, without family you're a nobody. Neglect your family means you're neglecting yourself" and I know his words are really deep. I miss him a lot when he's away. I know everyone does. The part of him buying souvenirs at the Malaysian airport no matter where he goes. It's funny, really. Or probably he'd buy us some university t-shirts and all.
I've been living apart from my family since secondary school, but then I never felt safer, going to sleep at night, knowing, kakqilah's still awake watching Smallville, my parents sleeping soundly next door(and would silently turn the lights off and tuck us in when we fell asleep with the tv and lights on), Kakak, still talking at the phone the other side next door, Abang, probably praying or reading and Luqman, watching football until it's late.
At times I sense some pain, in them, I don't know what or why, but they'd simply hide it under a smile or laughter, and let it off, not talking about it.
And the most important thing is that no matter where I go, I know I'd have a home to go back to. And it's peculiar how a dining table can make you feel so safe when all the chairs are occupied. And I can never forget Tokwan, always looking forward, always keeping the big family together. How he'd chat about politics or suddenly thought of going to Sunway Lagoon, and taking all the rides, with diabetes and many complications in his body. I admire how Tokwan can enjoy life with all the things he have to go through. And not forgetting Embah, our tough grandma, that I can describe in only one word-UNIQUE.
And well, cousins, that are simply FUN to be with. :) Each with their own personality.
I guess, that's why family means a lot to me. Cause I grew up in one that values togetherness more than anything.
:) Sorry Belle and Qyn for filling up with craps about family and stuff..yeah but you girls are right, really, i am a family person. Hahah. Later.
Arine :)
I just watched Cheaper By Dozen 2 and well, the last words caught me in the eye, "The hardest thing for a parent to do is letting go." I wonder too. How does it feel for my parents when all of us are growing up and day by day, share less and less things with her. And when we're all away to pursue in our lives, how would she feel coming back to an empty house?
You see, I think I've got two great parents that loves their children and provide us all not just a house, but a home. I'd be scolded if I miss dinner sometimes, cause well, that's basically our quality time together. But sometimes I wonder, what will happen to our family in the future then. I bet Kakak will be marrying soon, she's 24, Abang's gonna be some doctor far from us all, Kakqilah would be going to UK this year, probably I would, next year (if I focus :)) and well, Luqman, I know he'll go far, with such a creative mind and his social skills :)
Bapak once said, "Your family is everything to you, without family you're a nobody. Neglect your family means you're neglecting yourself" and I know his words are really deep. I miss him a lot when he's away. I know everyone does. The part of him buying souvenirs at the Malaysian airport no matter where he goes. It's funny, really. Or probably he'd buy us some university t-shirts and all.
I've been living apart from my family since secondary school, but then I never felt safer, going to sleep at night, knowing, kakqilah's still awake watching Smallville, my parents sleeping soundly next door(and would silently turn the lights off and tuck us in when we fell asleep with the tv and lights on), Kakak, still talking at the phone the other side next door, Abang, probably praying or reading and Luqman, watching football until it's late.
At times I sense some pain, in them, I don't know what or why, but they'd simply hide it under a smile or laughter, and let it off, not talking about it.
And the most important thing is that no matter where I go, I know I'd have a home to go back to. And it's peculiar how a dining table can make you feel so safe when all the chairs are occupied. And I can never forget Tokwan, always looking forward, always keeping the big family together. How he'd chat about politics or suddenly thought of going to Sunway Lagoon, and taking all the rides, with diabetes and many complications in his body. I admire how Tokwan can enjoy life with all the things he have to go through. And not forgetting Embah, our tough grandma, that I can describe in only one word-UNIQUE.
And well, cousins, that are simply FUN to be with. :) Each with their own personality.
I guess, that's why family means a lot to me. Cause I grew up in one that values togetherness more than anything.
:) Sorry Belle and Qyn for filling up with craps about family and stuff..yeah but you girls are right, really, i am a family person. Hahah. Later.
Arine :)
Monday, 17 March 2008
:)
Wo..memories from forum..sweet memories eh?? ^_^ Sometimes I think, life is full of coincidence, but in truth, they're all simply FATE :) I'm watching House currently..and thinking... BELLE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY..am I the only one watching 18SG and 18SX illegally now?? Yeah2..although physically I'm tall..but I am young ^_^..u see today, I accompanied my eldest sister to buy some stuff, and u know that shop girl asked? "Is that your big sister?" I'm like...Do I look older than a person 7 years older than me??
By the way, Belle, you know, if u wanna enter kick boxing after Easter, I bet u'd get Christina as company. Tun Razak is postponed..I heard. :)
And Qyn..whatever u do..u know we'll support u..but well..things will never be the same if one of us goes missing rite??
Anyway, Mr Bear finally emailed me today. Well, I figured that he stopped emailing not bcoz of that email we agreed to send, but he was caught in an accident. He blacked out in the middle of his journey home by a bicycle..and hospitalised for as long as that. Happy? Yeah. Mc Sub? Hmm, well...^_^ but then after a few hours I figured out I still need him for distraction. Cause well, I admit life had been dissappointing when Mr Bear suddenly shut up like that, but then, when he reappeared after that "temporary" leave, I guess things will never work out the way I want it to be.
Because who emails u for three years and simply ignores a message with your phone number, unless he takes it as "friends"? Yeah, maybe I should learn to accept reality..:) Those things will never happen^_^ Right? Maybe I got a little used to his absence already, although it really sucks sometimes.
But probably, this time, Mc Sub wouldn't help that much. Maybe I should start facing "it" rather than inventing a Mc Sub along the way. Haha..now Qyn I understand why substitutes never work when you really like a guy. :)
By the way, Belle, you know, if u wanna enter kick boxing after Easter, I bet u'd get Christina as company. Tun Razak is postponed..I heard. :)
And Qyn..whatever u do..u know we'll support u..but well..things will never be the same if one of us goes missing rite??
Anyway, Mr Bear finally emailed me today. Well, I figured that he stopped emailing not bcoz of that email we agreed to send, but he was caught in an accident. He blacked out in the middle of his journey home by a bicycle..and hospitalised for as long as that. Happy? Yeah. Mc Sub? Hmm, well...^_^ but then after a few hours I figured out I still need him for distraction. Cause well, I admit life had been dissappointing when Mr Bear suddenly shut up like that, but then, when he reappeared after that "temporary" leave, I guess things will never work out the way I want it to be.
Because who emails u for three years and simply ignores a message with your phone number, unless he takes it as "friends"? Yeah, maybe I should learn to accept reality..:) Those things will never happen^_^ Right? Maybe I got a little used to his absence already, although it really sucks sometimes.
But probably, this time, Mc Sub wouldn't help that much. Maybe I should start facing "it" rather than inventing a Mc Sub along the way. Haha..now Qyn I understand why substitutes never work when you really like a guy. :)
Thursday, 13 March 2008
^_^ Here I Am, Finally..
Okay, fine..I'm sorry I didn't update earlier..(u don't get siblings to fight one laptop with)..^_^..
anyway..right now..as you can guess, I'm at Tokwan's house, keeping him company. Did I mention he went to Sunway Lagoon yesterday? He's so full of life and spirit, I don't know how I'd do without him. Just finished watching Dunia Jam 11 with him and I think he's asleep already. Yeah, my uncle's family have to leave last minute and well, here we are, as SUBSTITUTES.. But I enjoy being a SUBSTITUTE..:) that's why SUBSTITUTES own special places in my heart..:P
My family's celebrating 2morrow, hols for most of them are ending by this Sunday, and well, soon, I can finally concentrate on homeworks..What's interesting today? Ate pizza...again, this time with my little kitten fightiing for the same pizza until I finally agreed to share:) (don't worry I know what hygiene means) and f.y.i..I get to download A Thousand Miles score for piano with my little brother's help. But it was fun, until I realize how hard it is to play the song. Too bad..
And well, here's the pics that suddenly appears in my phone after being taken by a little cousin ^_^:
They're so cute aren't they? :) It runs in the family...hehehehehe:p
I guess life has been at two extremes, awfully good and awfully bad. It depends on which one I choose to express everyday. And you know what I end up doing. At the end, you just tend to leave one option out rather then to tend to it. Settle down on what I have rather than what I lost, settling down on people who believe in me rather than people who gave up on me, knowing that you can't own everything..and at the end the hardest thing to do is not getting someone you really want, it's keeping that's hard..:) Alright2, I'd better stop with those philosophies..^_^
I think I need some sleep. BYE..
:) Always,
ARINE
anyway..right now..as you can guess, I'm at Tokwan's house, keeping him company. Did I mention he went to Sunway Lagoon yesterday? He's so full of life and spirit, I don't know how I'd do without him. Just finished watching Dunia Jam 11 with him and I think he's asleep already. Yeah, my uncle's family have to leave last minute and well, here we are, as SUBSTITUTES.. But I enjoy being a SUBSTITUTE..:) that's why SUBSTITUTES own special places in my heart..:P
My family's celebrating 2morrow, hols for most of them are ending by this Sunday, and well, soon, I can finally concentrate on homeworks..What's interesting today? Ate pizza...again, this time with my little kitten fightiing for the same pizza until I finally agreed to share:) (don't worry I know what hygiene means) and f.y.i..I get to download A Thousand Miles score for piano with my little brother's help. But it was fun, until I realize how hard it is to play the song. Too bad..
And well, here's the pics that suddenly appears in my phone after being taken by a little cousin ^_^:
They're so cute aren't they? :) It runs in the family...hehehehehe:p
I guess life has been at two extremes, awfully good and awfully bad. It depends on which one I choose to express everyday. And you know what I end up doing. At the end, you just tend to leave one option out rather then to tend to it. Settle down on what I have rather than what I lost, settling down on people who believe in me rather than people who gave up on me, knowing that you can't own everything..and at the end the hardest thing to do is not getting someone you really want, it's keeping that's hard..:) Alright2, I'd better stop with those philosophies..^_^
I think I need some sleep. BYE..
:) Always,
ARINE
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